I have a friend whose schedule is overloaded day-in and day-out, and he regards that as an indication of how important he is.
I have another friend whose investment portfolio is maxed out in just about every way, and he regards that as an indication of how successful he is.
And then there’s my friend who is zoned out, which I suppose is an indication of how happy he is. Sure, he’s fun, but he’s no brain surgeon.
The point here is not to be judgmental. I can spend half my time wigged out, pigged out or wiped out and I’m quite sure that’s nothing to brag about.
I want you consider the value of “empty” for a second.
As a visual, I want you think about an empty cup.
On the surface, you might think an empty cup is rather useless. It serves no purpose and offers no pleasure or comfort. I mean, it just sits there, sort of like a Bengal linebacker when a running play comes his way. And so it would seem that the only use for an empty cup is to sit in the kitchen cupboard until it’s time for milk and cookies.
But that’s not so. Instead, I would say an empty cup is a good thing. It’s available. It has freedom. In that regard, it has options. It isn’t stuck sitting around with the same old stuff in it every day.
I say that because I meet with so many people who are worn out and freaked out, and before long they’ll be stressed out. They have a daughter who just won’t grow up. Or they have an ex-spouse that tries to control their every move. Or, still yet, life has just thrown so many pressures and demands that they just can’t deal with it all.
Maybe you can relate.
When that is the case, your cup is full ... and certainly not in a good way.
Your cup is likely filled with the stale bitterness of an unresolved disagreement, probably from a very long time ago. Or maybe there’s a personal issue within you that you haven’t quite dealt with, so you take out your frustration on everyone else. Whatever it is, you’re in no position to tackle any challenge that comes your way today.
You say, “I can’t take any more.” Or maybe, “I’ve had it up to here.” Or both.
When that’s the case, even the slightest problem becomes a monumental challenge. The thought process shuts down, and reasoning ability is non-existent. And life becomes one crisis after another, with no peace.
When the daughter makes an off-handed callous comment, there’s a huge fight about it instead of a discussion. When the ex-spouse wants to switch his parenting time from Wednesday to Thursday, it’s practically a federal case instead of a simple task of making it work. And now you say the car broke down and it’s going to cost $400 to fix it? This is all way to much to handle.
What to do?
Empty the cup.
Forgive what needs to be forgiven. Let go what serves no purpose hanging onto. Own your own role in whatever problem you face. In other words, in a very real, tangible way, puncture a hole in the bottom of your cup, thus allowing the junk in the bottom to pour out.
You’ll feel better. You’ll think more clearly. And when someone comes knocking on your door to ruin your otherwise fine day, you’ll at least have some margin in your way of thinking so that you can deal with it.
Zig Ziglar is a famous motivational speaker who once said, “We all need a check up from the neck up to eliminate stinkin’ thinkin’.” He’s right.
What’s in your cup that stinks? And how does it keep getting in the way?
Empty the cup. It’s time to get sold out to a new way of handling life’s problems.